Kyle isn’t the type of guy to ask for something, so when he said, “I’d really like a Blackstone for my birthday,” we got him a Blackstone.  A Blackstone, for those of you who aren’t men aged 40-50 living in the suburbs, is a barbecue grill without a grill.  Instead, it’s a flat metal surface – similar to the cooking surface at a Teppanyaki restaurant, except that the person manning it isn’t flipping uncooked eggs onto the top of his Waggle baseball cap or shooting sake out of the crotch of a novelty person-shaped squirt gun.

“Is it a griddle?”  You may be asking yourself.  No, so sayeth every dad in the universe.  Yes, I will whisper to you; it’s a big griddle on wheels with a lid.  Kyle’s has a magnet to hold his cooking implements and a bottle opener, and when he uses it he wears the heavy-duty barbecue apron we gave him for our former plebian grill, and I guess if you put those elements together and squint you have a barbecue grill.  After acquiring his own Blackstone our neighbor quietly added a traditional barbecue grill to his patio, although if you ask him about it he mumbles something about meat and changes the subject.

However, for the sake of efficiency in this story, and for the sake of not spending a romantic evening in which Kyle laundry lists off the reasons a Blackstone is a grill, we shall thus forward call it a grill.

While our previous crappy grills came off the truck with a pile of beef already smoking on the cooktop, as the prettiest, most special-est princess of the barbecue grill industry, the Blackstone needed the propane equivalent of a massage and a hot towel before use.  Specifically, it needed multiple rounds of “seasoning.”  Kyle was the last of his friends to acquire a Blackstone – ugh, how embarrassing – and so he made sure to consult every one of them on the proper method for seasoning the grill before use.  These consultations took nearly a week, as each “Hey, how did you season your Blackstone” text message was returned with an hour-long phone call (and sometimes a visit to our house to look at the Blackstone) filled with advice and memories of food made with griddle-y magic.

Finally, Kyle emerged from the garage, apron abreast and hands coated in duck oil.

“It’s ready,” he said, too nonchalantly.

“Great,” I said.

“So, I can cook on it whenever you want,” he said.

“Great,” I said.  “Do you want to cook on it tonight?”

“Yeah, sure, whatever,” he shrugged.

We made steak tips and grilled veggies, and it was delicious.

“This is delicious,” I said, my mouth full of food.

“The Blackstone seals in the flavor,” Kyle said, nodding knowingly.  “And it’s FAST.  Did you notice how quickly dinner came together?”

“Yes, I did,” I lied.

Kyle spent the rest of the evening in the garage – while our past sucko grills lived outside in the elements, Kyle decided the Blackstone needed a proper home – cleaning the Blackstone.

“It seems like it takes longer to clean the Blackstone than to cook on the Blackstone,” I said to Kyle once he returned.

“Yes, it cooks very quickly,” he said, ignoring my point.

We had dinner on the Blackstone the next day, and the day after that, and every day following through the weekend.  Thirteen had a sleepover that Saturday, and on Sunday I pulled out the stovetop griddle (oh, yeah, we already had one) to make pancakes and bacon.

“You don’t need to dirty up the griddle,” Kyle said.  “I can make everything on the Blackstone.”

“Great,” I said.  “Let me just mix up the batter and you’ll be on your way.”

“Better make extra,” Kyle said.  “Those boys look hungry.”

Ten minutes later, he was back inside with approximately 100 pancakes and a pound of bacon.

“Wow, that’s a lot of food,” I said.

“Yeah, and fast, right?  Plus, it sealed in the flavor.”

“That’s wonderful,” I said.

Apparently I had been holding out on my son’s friends because they ate all 100 of those pancakes and the entire pound of bacon.  No one was happier than Kyle and the Blackstone.

“Yep, I made 100 pancakes and a pound of bacon on there,” he said to one of the dads later that day when they came to pick up their kid.

“No kidding,” the dad said.  “I once made 50 burgers and 200 hot dogs on mine.”

“Can’t beat that speed,” Kyle said.

“Or the flavor,” the dad said.  They both sniffed, and nodded.

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The photo above is of the grillmaster and his beloved Blackstone making, appropriately, pancakes and bacon (and something else – corn? Can’t tell).

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This week on North Dakota Today we talked about Bette Ritterman, my Nice Person of the Week, as well as a stack of upcoming opportunities for art at the North Dakota Museum of Art. Check it out. (Valley News Live)

Several participants of the Grand Forks Community Garden planted their plots with the intent to donate what they grew to food pantries – and so far they’ve already grown and given away 77 pounds. (Grand Forks Herald)

In North Dakota-adjacent news, Glenwood’s Colin Richards’ sister, Olivia, is forging a career path based on her brother’s own life-changing experiences. (Valley News Live)

After 79 years, Hurdsfield’s Edward Johnson has been found. (Minot Daily News)

Phew!  or Meow! (Williston Herald)

Looking for something to do September 25-28?  Volunteer at Hostfest! (Minot Daily News)

Kyle and his friends, Corey and Kelly, have a podcast called North Dakota After Dark where they talk about youth hockey in North Dakota.  The latest episode is up and was a live show and I was one of the guests.  Check it out. Bonus: you can watch it on YouTube. (North Dakota After Dark)

One of my readers, Faye, sent me a stack of nice news that she found in her own travels around the Internet.  Here they are (thanks, Faye!):

Bismarck’s Tina Herr is packing backpacks to help the homeless. (KFYR TV)

An Oakes student named Kya Foss has started a GoFundMe to fund school snacks for all. (Valley News Live)

A bunch of boys from Sigma Alpha Epsilon walked from Grand Forks to Fargo to raise money for mental health awareness. (Fargo Forum)

There are still plenty of opportunities to walk in support of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. (AFSP)

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