North Dakota had a touch o’ the weather over the Christmas break, as it rained ice for three solid days.  You may be surprised to hear that we don’t get ice storms very often in the Upper Plains; our major temperatures are Cold, Not Cold Yet/Anymore, and Hot, none of which are conducive to ice storms.  Obviously, we like ice – on our skating rinks, on our ice fishing lakes, and in our “Living in North Dakota is UFF-DA Hook” novelty insulated mugs.   It turns out, though, that we don’t really like-like it when it comes down by the inch from the sky.

As we were in Canada for most of the break, the Kosiors experienced the storm via social media (and our neighbors calling to gently suggest, “FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY DO NOT GET ON THE ROAD”).  It wasn’t until we drove up our driveway, put the truck in park, and then waited while the truck slid back down the driveway and into the street that we realized that the storm was more than glittering trees and temporary airport closures.  Fortunately, Kyle is the King of Random Screws in Coffee Cans and Ice Melt, and so he layered our driveway with an aggressive amount of salt, brought his wife and suitcases into the house, and went on what he thought was our merry way.

We awoke the next morning to continued unseasonably lovely weather.  Outside, water dripped from every ice-coated surface, dropping rainbows in the sunshine.

“Well, it was pretty while it lasted,” I said to Kyle as he closed the door on his way out to chip the remaining ice off of the driveway.  He was back an hour later, covered in sweat.

“Get’er done?”  I asked.

“I didn’t even make it through the top layer,” he said, digging around for more ice melt.  “That ice is THICK.”

For the rest of the day, the ice melted.  It melted and melted and melted.  It melted off of rooftops, branches, and power lines, dropping ice chunks the size of my fist onto the ground.  It melted the top layer of that thick ice, creating a slushy, ice chunk-filled sheen as far as the eye could see.  And then, when the sun went down…it froze.

I drove Eight to hockey later that evening.  We parked near the berm.

“Walk on the snow as much as you can,” I said as I turned off the engine.  “It will be less slippery than the sidewalks.”

“This snow isn’t snow at all!”  Eight laughed, sliding out of the car and onto his butt.  Holding onto the car handle, I stamped down on a nearby layer of ice-coated snow, expecting my foot to break through to the fluff.  Nothing happened.

“We’ll just do our best,” I said, hoisting his equipment bag out of my trunk.

It turned out “our best” was Eight sliding along as if he were on skates, using his goalie stick as a ballast.  He was at the arena before I made it onto the sidewalk.  “My best,” on the other hand, was me standing in place trying to figure out if I should take a running leap onto the hockey bag and slide on my belly to the door like a penguin or get back in the car and forget the whole thing.  Fortunately/unfortunately, one of the hockey dads pulled up behind me.  He took Eight’s hockey bag in one hand, my arm in another, and push-pulled us both indoors.

“Thank you,” I said, doing my best not to melt into my own layer of embarrassment (as you can probably guess, I am a VERY ATTRACTIVE slip-slider shuffle walker).

“A person could use a pair of those metal ice cleats for a day like today,” he said, pretending like I hadn’t been hanging off him in the most awkward way only moments before.

“Maybe I should hire a professional piggybacker,” I said, not at all joking.

“Haha,” he said politely.

Several days have since passed, and the sidewalks and snow piles are no less treacherous.  Kyle has switched from ice melt to ice softener because it’s cheaper the pellets are larger and melt faster in the sun.  For my part, I have become uncomfortably (for their part) close to a lot of the gentlemen in this town, who have had to rescue me every single time I have gone out of the house.  One of my favorite (“favorite”) memories is when I slipped exiting my car in the parking lot of a local store and had to hold onto the door as one would a mast amidst the storm until one of the employees could reach me and tote me indoors.  Said employee, appropriately concerned for my continued well-being, not only helped me do my shopping but also offered to take my packages out to my car.

“Can I sit in the shopping cart and have you push me out there, as well?”  I asked.

“…Yes?”  The young man said.

“I’m kidding,” I lied.

“Haha,” he said politely.

My most frequent rescuer, obviously, has been Kyle.  Recently, we went out for a quick errand, Kyle holding me by the hand until I had fully seated and buckled myself into the vehicle.

“Will you still love me when I ultimately break my hip?”  I asked.

“Yes, but I’d love it a lot more if you didn’t,” he said.

“I guess you’ll have to carry me around everywhere for the next month, then,” I said.

“Uff-da,” he said, shaking a bit of ice melt off his shoes.

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My sweet, handsome husband has spent the past week diligently clearing our driveway of ice. Here is a photo of him at his hometown rink (he left the ice in place in that case).

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I’ll be back on North Dakota Today on Monday!  In the meantime, check out my most recent segment on North Dakota Today, where we talked about Department 701 and Lefse.  Check it out, and please send me your nice stories and people for future episodes!  (Valley News Live)

Grand Forks’ Tina Black donated 560 pairs of pajamas to area seniors this Christmas in honor of her son. (Fargo Forum)

Mott set out to achieve – and accomplished – a world record fireworks show on December 30. (KFYR TV) (YouTube)

Not nice: Power has been out in parts of North Dakota for nearly two weeks.  VERY NICE: A cafe in Enderlin, partnerned with the Enderlin Lions Club, have been feeding lineworkers (and the community) and giving families without power a place to charge their phones. (Grand Forks Herald)

Fargo’s Dr. Grant Syverson has helped ten children get their wishes granted (plus provided a big donation to the organization), courtesy of Make-a-Wish. (Jamestown Sun)

In “that ice storm was no joke” news, Bismarck’s Alisha Bandle Thomas made sure people received their Christmas gifts on time. (KFYR TV)

The Happy Hooligans have a new commander: Fargo’s Col. Chris Domitrovich. (Fargo Forum)

In North Dakota-adjacent news, Moorhead’s Mary Arnholt has been presented with a MoorHeart Award for clearing the snow from her neighborhood fire hydrant for the past 20 years. (Fargo Forum)

I love this profile of a Minot artist named Stephanie Grondahl. (Minot Daily News)

The community of Williston helped the local Salvation Army beat their red kettle goal this year. (Williston Herald)

Also as a reminder, Kyle and his friends, Corey and Kelly, have a podcast called North Dakota After Dark where they talk about youth hockey in North Dakota.  The latest episode is up and it’s with a family therapist.  Check it out. Bonus: you can watch it on YouTube. (North Dakota After Dark)

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